2009 NCAA Tournament has led me to fasting

Sports writers use professional insight and, typically, correct grammar. That's what sets reporters apart from regular fans. And journalist get paid to watch the games and then give that professional insight to readers. It's not as simple as it seems, however. It takes years of couch time, watching sports, talking sports, playing sports until you realize you aren't good enough, and then you continue part of this routine into college where most will spend four years (some six). Then in college, a sports writer will learn to read and write and open a can of soup without slicing my foot wide open.
Point is, this job isn't just for anyone.
For instance, I use a strict process every week to come up with the detailed and factual opinions I give to this blog. Unfortunately, I have no idea what that process is and because of the NCAA basketball tournament, I haven't wanted to think about sports of any kind. The rest of my bracket kicked the bucket last week. I put my heart into my picks and not one team cared enough to love me back. They are all gone.
My pride has nothing left in the tank. I feel defeated, uninspired and lost. My misery has led me to fasting twice a day (in between breakfast and lunch and in between lunch and dinner). I haven't shaved since Sunday (I usually don't shave that often anyway, but figured saying that would help create the mood).
Today, I tried watching SportsCenter for the first time since my Final Four was brutally plucked from the field. Watching ESPN just hurt me more. I had to turn it off. I had some breakfast and went back to bed for an hour or so.
It was good sleep. It was good for the soul because when I woke up, I could see the light (because it was shining in my window) and the light gave me hope.
And I needed to run some errands, take care of some work stuff and blog, so I sprung from my slumber to the computer, ready to start fresh.
It was like a brand new beginning to the same day. That's what napping after breakfast will give you and I strongly encourage doing this.
Anyway, I knew it was time to put my 2009 March Madness bracket behind me. I was ready to blog.
But then I realized I had no idea what to write.
At first, I thought I could blog about the Astros since opening day is Monday. I figured I could break the team down and tell you why Houston won't make the playoffs. But, I have six months to feel bad about the Astros. I have six months to wonder how it's possible that a Major League Baseball team plans to start Geoff Blum everyday at third base. I have all season to wonder why Geoff spells his name wrong.
So I crossed the Astros off the list. I'll do that next week.
So in search of blogging inspiration, I decided to go to ESPN.com, which was a monumental mistake that forced me into a relapse of my pitiful mood.
Why?
John Calipari. Kentucky. John Calipari. College basketball. Memphis. Arizona. Oklahoma. Missouri. UMass. Calipari. Billy Gillespie. College basketball. NCAA tournament. Final Four. Marcus Camby. UConn. Michigan State. Indiana State. North Carolina. Jeff Capel. Patt Forde. Larry Bird. Tom Izzo. Villanova. 1985. Magic Johnson. Jud Heathcote. 1979. Expected Kentucky roster. Expected Memphis roster. Whose going where because there is one recruit, who has a brother, who might have a cousin, who might be dating this girl, who has another brother from an aunt with a different mother and she said they wanted the one kid to go to Kansas anyway.
We'll try this again next week.
Good luck to those of you who still have an incentive for caring about college basketball this season.